Refereeing a Kids’ Football Match – A Cautionary Tale

A couple of weeks ago, I got roped into helping out with my son’s under-7 football team. I’m there every week with my lad anyway, so when I was asked, I thought I might as well.

What they didn’t mention before I’d done my DBS check and had my team jacket ordered though, was that they wanted me to do some refereeing. As the least authoritative and focused person I know, I wasn’t quite sure that I was really referee material. My back was against the wall though, so I lined up last Sunday, whistle in hand to do my first spot of officiating.

Would I get shouted at by the parents? Would I have to send an unruly child off? Would I forget all the rules of football?

Read on for some tips.

 

Have an excuse ready

If you’re ever asked to referee at any level, just say no. It’s an amazing way to fall out of love with the beautiful game. I have no idea why anyone would willingly be a referee.

I got caught on the hop, so just ended up agreeing to it like a chump. If you’re a regular presence at your child’s football meet ups though, you’re also in danger of being asked. Have an excuse ready to go just in case. A rare disease that’s tricky to Google will do. Anything that would hinder you walking around a pitch or seeing what’s going on. Maybe a weird cramp that makes one foot obscure your vision for spells.

If you’re reading this though, chances are you’ve already agreed to do it. Hard cheese, my friend.

 

Focus on the basics

When it came to the start of the match, I blew my whistle, and within seconds the home team had scored. Cheers came from the crowd, the kids were bouncing about, but the away team manager was shouting for my attention.

They hadn’t finished getting all their players on the pitch, and were a player short.

I’d spent so long thinking about hypotheticals such as ‘what happens when a keeper is the first to touch the ball after their own goal kick?’, that I’d forgotten to just check that all the players were actually on the pitch.

 

Be decisive

I swear I must have some undiagnosed ADHD or something, because I really struggle to focus on one thing without my mind wandering. Even though I was keen to get everything right, and had no other distractions, I often found my thoughts trailing off.

This meant that on occasion, I didn’t have the faintest idea which side kicked the ball out of play.

Saying “I dunno, what do you reckon?” isn’t really an option. It’s a 50/50 chance, so just pick an outcome, say it confidently enough, and hope that you’ve guessed right.

 

Be at least a little loose with the rules

These are kids, so if you blow for ever infringement you spot, it’s gonna make for one long monotone whistle concert for the parents in the crowd. I tended to let a lot slide to keep the game going and not freeze the kids up for fear of doing something wrong.

 

Try to be as unbiased as possible

Tricky balancing act this one. My son was on one of the teams, and as I let his teammate get away with a scything challenge on an opponent, he ran past chuckling and said “haha, nice one, Dad”.

Not ideal. Thankfully my son gave me a chance to show my impartiality later in the game by slightly grazing the ball with his hand. I whistled for handball, and four days later he’s just about forgiven me.

 

Just stop play when the tears come

Tears are part-and-parcel of the under-7s game, and this one was no different. As a particularly ferocious shot was blocked by one of the players’ chests, it knocked all the wind out of him and caused him to get upset. As I was checking he was okay and hoping he’d be able to continue, I had absolutely zero idea of what was happening in the game behind me.

Just stop the game for a short spell and send any upset kids to their coaches on the sidelines.

 

Reflecting on the match afterwards, it had been a bit of a mixed refereeing bag. I’d made plenty of mistakes, but only a handful were noticed, so that’s at least a partial victory in my eyes.

Thankful that my ordeal was over, I handed the whistle back to the head coach.

“Oh no” he said, “keep hold of that for next time”.

Great. Just great.

 

Check out these tips for choosing a football club for your 5 year old

Avoid refereeing altogether by choosing a different outdoor activity.