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These are some strange times we’re living in right now, but the curious thing is how the same problem has affected everybody differently.
Take my good buddy, Matt, for instance. Matt is roughly the same age as me, grew up in the same town, and even enjoys eating uncooked Super Noodles, just like me. But his experiences over the last few months has been anything but similar.
Lockdown for me has also been a chance to discover our love languages, balancing work from home with caring for a newborn and entertaining two primary-age kids. No mean feat. My single and childless pal Matt on the other hand, has been able to kick back, catch up on all the box sets he’s been meaning to watch, and basically do as he damn well pleases. Of course, I wouldn’t change my married family life for Matt’s bachelor lifestyle, but let’s just say the single life certainly has its plus points.
One way I can console myself about Matt’s easier life right now is when it comes to dating: I’m so glad I didn’t have to navigate all the post-lockdown measures when I was dating. It wasn’t till he got in touch last week that I even considered the difficulties. Even then though, Matty has always been the kind of guy to spin a negative into a positive.
Dating While Practising Social-Distancing
The Initial Meet
When I was young, free and single, the internet was still in its infancy (it wasn’t THAT long ago, alright?), so dating was usually just through a ‘friend of a friend’ type scenario. Now everybody’s social-distancing, everyone’s finding dates online. The whole world is your oyster!
Ol’ Matty boy knows this all too well. His last serious relationship was with a lovely girl from Edinburgh. Problem was that Matt lives just outside Stevenage now. As you can imagine, the distance caused some issues, and unfortunately it didn’t work out. I guess if a 13-hour round drive to Edinburgh and back doesn’t cause you to reconsider just how strong your feelings are, then nothing will.
I’d joked at the time that it was a shame that there wasn’t a dedicated Hertfordshire dating site for him to use. Instead of joking though, I should have been brushing up a business plan instead! Someone’s only gone and done it before me, haven’t they? Matt’s just registered himself to datehertfordshiresingles.co.uk. I swear my phone is bugged.
One thing I hadn’t considered is how he’d gone about being on a physical date. Matt’s always keen to show that he’s a gentleman, and can always be called upon to open a door for the fairer sex. Wanting to show to his date that he was serious about taking precautions with the pandemic too, he’d ordered some antimicrobial gloves from Unigloves to use for opening the restaurant and taxi doors.
Leaving Bad Dates
In my day (God, I sound old), a bad date was one hell of a chore to get through. I remember sitting politely as a girl I was on a date with went on, and on, and ON about her bloody ex. I mean, after the date I could barely remember her name, but I knew her ex’s star sign, shoe size and his mother’s maiden name.
Matt’s had a couple of Zoom dates, which initially sounded a bit naff, but actually sounds like an amazing screening process. “Sorry, what did you say your ex’s favourite film was again? My internet connection’s breaking up. I’ll have to go!”
As for those dates that start talking about marriage and having kids within the first 5 minutes of meeting – social distancing has offered guys the perfect excuse for things to slow RIGHT down!
As the Night Progresses
Well, this is where old Matty boy is going to struggle to spin this into a positive.
Back when I was dating, if a date asked if you had any protection, you could nip into the pub toilets and find a dispenser on the wall.
If someone asks Matt if he’s got any protection now, he’ll have to knock on the bedroom door in a hazmat suit and full PPE.
I guess then, that socially distanced dating has its pros and cons. That being said, I think I’d still struggle to offer my old pal any sympathy. I’ll reserve that for if he ever becomes a father. He’d soon realise that not being able to go out for social gatherings isn’t just for pandemics: it’s called becoming a parent!